Friday, November 18, 2011

Celebrating Life - All of It!

Frankly life gets in the way sometimes.  I meant to post here everyday when I first started my year-long- journey to become more healthy - to eat more wisely and to exercise more.  Then like always, I got off track.  Not with my eating so much, but with recording what I'm doing by journaling.

Relationships are critical to me and I know that.  Even though I may not know you personally, your input and words of encouragement are like gasoline on a fire to me.  That's how important you and this blog can be to me and my endeavour.   Imagine that.

Two things have happened.  First, I tore my miniscus (knee) and had to have minor knee surgery.  Because of that, I have  not been allowed to exercise (at least anything that moves my knee) and not even ride my horse.  Basically, I haven't been moving much.  Not moving is not a common thing for me.  I never stop...unless I'm forced to by an injury. That's happened a couple times before.

Keith Oliver didn't give up on me.  He has been so inspirational that I've begun to believe in myself and the ability I have to control how I feel and of course how I look.  During Keith's weekly visits we talk.  I've come to value failure and am beginning to use it as a learning tool.  That almost blows my mind.  I value failure????  Who does that?

My biggest failure has been in not writing down what I eat.  That's been a problem for me every single time I've tried to keep track of what I'm doing.  Keith pointed out to me that I also close my eyes when lifting weights and doing sit-ups. So, I close my eyes while exercising and stop writing down what I'm eating after a short period of time.  What does that mean?  I'm still working on the answer.

The other cool thing that's come to my mind is that I'm going to give up using my age as an excuse for having trouble losing weight.  Why?  Because even in the midst of all this down time that I've had, I didn't gain a pound. I may not lose weight as quickly as I did in my 20's and 30's and yes, even 40's but calories are calories. 

I am celebrating losing five pounds when I could have gained twenty.  I am celebrating eating mindfully and protein drinks.  In fact, there's not much I'm not celebrating right now.  Thank you God!!

I'm glad you stopped by to read my post.  Please leave your words of wisdom before you leave!

Friday, October 7, 2011

The Practice of Patience....

Keith allowed me to share his story here.  You'll see why after you read his story.  Thank you Keith!

A short story by Keith Oliver for all my gardening friends.
Now is the time of the year that our gardens are drawing to a close, the last of the tomatoes are coming off, pumpkins and chrysanthemums are now in the height of their growing period. We begin to think about what preparation our soil needs to be fertile for next year’s life sustaining vegetables to yield a bumper crop.
Right now is also a good time for any transplants to be cultivated and put in their designated areas. Just dig to make enough room for them to mature and fertilize the bottom of the transplant area to insure healthy deep roots. Next cover the plants a little further up the main stem than they were planted before with rich loose soil. Lightly water these plants until soil is moist and cover with at least 4" of mulch to retain as much life giving water as possible and to act as a insulating blanket for the root system to properly form.
This spring will be a delightful time to watch the snow melt off of the tops of plants as they start to emerge, WARNING; this is also a time that we will lose many transplants because plants are still tender and need a little more time before they are ready to emerge. We can help our plantings by covering them with a additional layer of organic materiel and a couple more inches of mulch, the added time will give our plants a boost in nutrients and allow for robust rooting.
Don’t be alarmed when the efforts we have put forth don’t exactly "pop" that first year. There is a saying in the gardening world that my Grandmother Helen reminds me of every year as I help her to thin her hostas and expand my own plantings, I can hear her clearly informing me that the first season of growth will "sleep" they wont exactly mature to their best potential and many times they may not flower at all. Not to worry, the following season things will get a little better, all plants properly tended will "creep" beginning to show their flowers more often while their roots will fully develop.
The patience and consistency that you show your garden will be rewarded the following season by the event that all gardeners anticipate, at last your garden will finally "LEAP"!
The harvesting of the leap season in your garden will be truly rewarding. It will not matter that some of the fruits of your labor will be eaten by pestilence. You will find this seasons abundance will more than make up for any losses you may have, furthermore many of us find that our greatest challenge in these seasons of plenty are keeping up with the collection of our mature plantings and enjoying as much fresh nutrients possible before the years close when we begin to think about how we can improve next years harvest.
There are astounding similarities to the development of our lives found in these gardening techniques. If we begin in our proper areas; our most fertile environment and take a little care we can expect to realize the height of our growth potential.
The soil represents our souls or our spirits that need depth enough to make room for robust development. The fertilizer represents the nutrients that we feed our spirits, these nutrients encompass all we hear, see, read, watch, think and speak and if applied appropriately will make a excellent platform for our enrichment. The water represents our bodies, since we are made up of mostly water you can see how when we have our machines properly prepared we will be ready to say yes to our potential blessings and live up to our highest possibilities. The mulch represents our friends and families; the people that we choose to surround ourselves with, they insulate us from the frigid circumstances that life’s winter can sometimes produce while encouraging us to stay healthy in mind and body.
The cycles of development of plants also mimic life.
Before we realize a thing we could be considered to have been asleep, that is stagnant or slow in our maturity.
The practice of patience and consistent care produce the creeping results we find in the garden, meaning that we begin to realize who we are and what we are meant to pursue.
Finally many of us have experienced the blessing of a leap year, a time so abundant in spirit and materiel that we cannot deny our fortunes. Your leap may have developed on a different branch than that of your neighbor, while his professional life may be blooming you’re personal or spiritual or family goals may be in bloom. Take comfort in the knowledge that if properly prepared you can develop blooms on other branches as well.
None of these things are possible without the warmth of the SUN; of course the sun represents GOD. The loving comfort you enjoy when you feel the rays of love shining in your life. The sun gives plants the ability to absorb nutrients from their surroundings and is the bringer of life. Without the Sun we would all clumsily fumble around in the darkness until our inevitable death.
Thank you God for the light you shine into our lives. We acknowledge that without your divine care our efforts would be in vain. Continue to shine your blessings on us and we will tend our gardens well.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Absent but Never Gone

Absent but never gone is true about my posts for this blog and trying to make thoughtful lifestyle changes.  The good news is that my sister's surgery went well the bad news is that the minute I got home from Texas my father-in-law was hospitalized and has been in ICU until today.  Honestly, there has been no reason for me not to write except that I was preoccupied.

So in a nutshell, that's why I've been AOL.  And in a nutshell, those of us with eating disorders or dieting dilemmas are going to always live with a cloud over our heads.  I guess that cloud can be good or bad depending on if our bodies are in the season of drought or if they're saturated and content because the sun managed to peek through.  No matter what, even if we're not constantly thinking about what or what not to eat, that little cloud is always there...somewhere.  Does any of this make sense?

Unlike some people, I'm not an emotional eater.  I'm an emotional non-eater.  The fact that emotions contribute to what I eat or don't eat isn't a good thing although my conscious mind is always happy when I'm not hungry. I constantly have to tell myself that food is good. It is not bad.  It is good to eat.  It is bad to not eat.  Bottom line is, I'm still writing.  I'm still trying.  I AM NOT GOING TO DIET.  I am going to eat.  So here's a toast to ....bottom lines.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

What's the Key?

Okay. Here's the deal.  I'm in Texas right now because my sister had surgery.  I can't remember what day is what,  but I do remember when my year with this blog started.  I'm not going to announce days of my posts anymore, I'm just going to post.

Something interesting happened yesterday.  I was at the hospital all day and my sister's surgery was much later than it was suppose to be.  I grabbed a broccoli salad for lunch and was suppose to go out to dinner when my nephew came to the hospital. 

Well, our wires got crossed.  My nephew didn't come and there was nothing to eat anywhere in the hospital.  Surprising to me, after a certain point I wasn't hungry.  I had plenty to drink and because there was no food around, I wasn't obsessing.  Maybe the key is to deal with my psychological obsession and not food itself. 

Or maybe the key is to keep myself so busy that I don't have time to obsess.  Or maybe the key is to listen to my body and not my mind.  What IS the key?

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Days 19 and 20 - Weekends are Challenging

Writing has been therapeutic for me...not surprising.  Reading the comments that some of you have left has been inspirational and exciting.  Keith is brilliant.  I am saving all his comments because he will have chapters of a book ready for submission.  Even if you haven't signed up to follow this site yet, please take the time to read Keith's comments.  They are far more valuable than anything I have to say.

Weekends are always challenging for me. I'm trying to keep things in perspective because of something Keith said about failures.  Actually, Keith congratulated me on a failure because of the new beginning that comes from that failure.  I'm being brief here, but that's close to the context of his message.  I also think it can be said that a lapse isn't a relapse.  Picking up and plunging ahead is what I do best.

My goal for tomorrow is to eat three meals that are healthy for my mind and soul.  Just tomorrow.  That's all I can think about right now.  One day at a time.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Days 17 and 18 - That's What Friends Are For....

I talked to Joani, my longest and best ever friend friend yesterday.  I knew she read my posts from time to time but didn't know how much she really kept up with what I was saying.  It's interesting and somewhat significant that I had taken time to really pray about my difficulty on Monday or Tuesday.  I prayed and then I forgot I prayed.  What I do remember is the conversation I had with God.  "Please show me why I continually sabotage myself when it comes to eating," I said to Him. " Maybe if it becomes clearer to me I can deal with my issues and stop jinxing myself."

I don't know if you believe in answered prayers or not but I do.  I just never expected it to be answered in the form of Joani.  In a quick phone conversation with Joani yesterday she said several significant things.  First of all she pointed out that Keith is a genius.  I'm going to go back and read all his comments because I agree with her.  Then she talked about the issue my mom had with my body...that I now know was not all bad.  WhatJoani said made sense.  I want her to repeat what she said so I don't take it out of context or misspeak.  Maybe she'll have time to leave a comment. But, my point is this, sometimes the answers to our problems are so close we can't see them.  Joani was the answer to my prayer and I can't wait until this weekend when I can talk to her more.  Keith too.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Days 14, 15, 16 - CRAP!

Well, today is day 16 and basically I ate crap.   On top of that, I feel like crap.  I can't figure out why I keep jinxing myself.  Saturday and Sunday went well and I felt terrific.  What would make me not want to feel like that all the time?  I really don't know.

Putting the right foods into my body makes me feel better.  I'm disgusted with myself but what's new.  Since my eating journey is about truth and awareness I guess I'm still on track.  I told the truth and I am totally aware of why I feel badly today.  Ice cream and potato chips were not my plan for lunch.  I have to admit they did taste good while I was chewing but I would not feel so sluggish right now if I'd had a crunchy apple, some baked chicken, and a fresh green salad.  That was my original plan.

I have an 11-year-old King Charles Spaniel who was just diagnosed as being diabetic.  I didn't even know she was sick until her glucose level came back at 400. In fact, I just assumed she was sleeping a lot because she's getting old.  She's been on insulin for three days now and she's like a puppy again.  I don't want to become diabetic and I know that I can prevent it by the way I live my life. Sluggish is not a word that fits into my vocabulary.  Help me out here!